Last week we talked about delegation and how empowering others can help them develop just as much as it can help you relax. Win, win, right?!
But what happens when the frustrations you have are from situations you have little control over? A client of mine recently said, "I just wish people would be nice to each other!" Neither one of us has any control over how others behave, but their behavior impacts us just the same.
Hearing about murders, abuse, assault, death, hate crime, etc can sure put a damper on your day. I watch the news very sparingly for this reason. As an empath, it's hard to hear all the heavy, heartbreaking stories without doing a lot of work to keep my light shining bright. But that same heartbreak is sometimes in our own homes, our workplaces, or communities. You can just turn off the news but you can't avoid life. So what do you do?
First, you change your mindset. It is so easy to think that if you wouldn’t act in some way, no one should. When they do, then you fall into the rabbit hole of, “how could they, why would they, don’t they see how awful that is?” This leads us to feel down, depressed, and blue. The reality is that we will never know or understand why some people act in the way that they do. We do not live their lives, we do not experience their heartaches, and we cannot control their behaviors. Our mindset cannot be, “you shouldn’t do that” but instead, “your choice, your consequence.” See if you feel heavy, depressed, angry, frustrated, sad, etc after hearing about someone else’s poor decisions, they are likely feeling the same heaviness on some level. They may not be in a place to heal and do better, but that doesn’t mean they don’t feel the heaviness just the same. We have to trust that they are in that place on their journey for a reason, and it is not our place to judge it. For me, this is one of the hardest mindset shifts to make. In my own life, and the lives of my clients, I see how much better people feel after doing the work to grow and develop as human beings. When I hear of people who are stuck in a low vibration with seemingly no way out, it breaks my heart. I’m sure you’re that way too. In those moments, I have to remember that they are on their journey and it is not mine to control. What I can control is how I show up in the world.
So after releasing the burden of their decisions, then it’s time to step into your own decisions. Lead by example, as they say. Every contact you make throughout the day has the potential to change someone’s whole life. You’ve heard the stories of the child planning to end their life until a classmate helped them pick up their books. Such a small task, but enough to change the course of that student’s day. I would not be a Women’s Wellness Coach and writing to you if it weren’t for three very special women just doing their jobs when I showed up for my respective appointments with them. You have the potential to help raise someone’s vibration every day. The potential to encourage better choices and a step in the right direction. It may not feel like it and you may never know the impact you have, but if you share your light, the world can only get brighter.
Instead of dimming your light and living in someone else’s depression, sadness, and anger. Be the light that they need. I often refer to this as being a lighthouse. In a storm, the lighthouse is used to guide vessels safely into the harbor. When the sea is crashing, the sky is thundering, and the darkness is all-engulfing, there stands the lighthouse. The light is not dimmed because of the turmoil, instead, it stands tall and bright guiding the way. You can do this too.
Don’t dim your light when someone is in the midst of their storm, be the lighthouse and guide the way. Be the positive influence that changes the day. Be the vibration that raises the spirits of everyone in the room.
If you are in your own storm and ready to shine bright again, I’d love to help you out. Book your session with me here.
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