Who are you in this season?

What season of life are you in? 

I just recently celebrated my 10-year anniversary of graduating from nursing school. I obtained my BSN at the University of Mary in Bismarck, North Dakota. When I look back at the last 10 years, or even 14 years if we include my time in school, I am amazed by the different seasons of life that time has brought to me. From insecurity, abusive relationships, and a need to please others to confidence, empowerment, and a desire to live life as my best self every day, a whole lot has changed. Obviously, some of that change is tangible. I’m no longer living on a college kid budget and donating plasma to buy gas or groceries for the week. I’m no longer questioning my basic nursing skills. I’m no longer single without children as I am now married with a beautiful Bonus Daughter and another daughter on the way. 

But some of those life stages are less noticeable and less tangible. I no longer question my faith or what it means to trust in God’s plan for my life. I no longer feel the need to please those around me. I no longer struggle to say no when an offer comes my way that doesn’t serve my higher priorities. I know how to fiercely trust my gut and lean into the things that are uncomfortable, as those are the things that help us grow the most. 

All of this got me thinking about life stages, how we all shift through them differently, and how some of them take a little longer than others. An example we’re both probably familiar with is the desire to “settle down and start a family.” For some people, this desire is deeply prominent from a young age and they have no qualms about doing so from high school on. For others, there is a need to be independent first. To be “free” and not “tied down” until one day, the tides change and that desire to share life with someone develops. The person in the first example might be 18 when they long for a family of their own, in the second example, might be 28 but the life stage is the same. 

We are so quick to assume that due to someone’s age, they should be at a particular place in their development, or that because we felt a certain way at a certain time in our lives, those around us should too. I caution you against this, but even more so, I caution you against shaming yourself for being in a different life stage than someone else. Each stage of life requires a different version of us. You may not have grown into the version of yourself that is required for the next life stage yet. 

That is okay. The real question is never, “should I be further along in life?” but instead, “who am I in this season of life?” Follow that up with, “who do I want to be in this season of life?” If those two answers are not the same, then you know where there is work to be done. 

Another way to look at this is to consider if you’re trying to be an older version of yourself in a newer season of life. Could it be that a part of why you’re struggling is because who you are showing up as today, is not matching the version of you that is required to be successful in this season of life? 

These are hard truths to consider, even harder if you recognize there is work to be done and you’re feeling a little uneasy about how to make that happen. I’d love to help you discover how to become the version of you that this season of life requires of you. The version of you that you’re proud to show up as. Let’s book a “Better Mom Meeting” and create a game plan for you.