When all of the Shelter-in-Place orders started being released across the US I saw a meme on Facebook that said
“The virus is enhancing what is already inside of each person. Jerks are turning into bigger jerks. Compassionate people are becoming more compassionate. You get to decide in this very difficult time who you really are. Hopefully, we all make the right decision –James Tucher.”
I love this. I love this more now than ever before. I love this because it is a perfect example of how unique each person is and how each of us is in a different place in our spiritual growth and personal development journey. Here’s the thing; your partner, your kiddo, your best friend-they are all in a different place. They are all experiencing this in their own way, and it is unique to them. Just like your experience is unique to you. We must always offer some grace to each other as we go through this journey called life, but especially now. As this continues, as certain states open up and others don’t, as people begin to get frustrated with the inconsistency in the research, policies, and continued disruption of their life, as the riots continue, you will begin to see the best and worst of one another. It’s not to forgive or excuse poor behavior, but instead to recognize it for what it is and offer the grace each person deserves on their journey.
Your soul is on this earth to learn things, and my goodness is there a lot of lessons being learned through this pandemic! Everyone’s lesson will be different though. As in most other occasions in our lives, those around us may not be in the same place as we are. They may take the long way around on their way to the answers. They may not go through this the way you would. That is okay. It is okay because you’re not living their life. You are living your life. You have muttered to your kids at least once in their life, “you just worry about you, okay.” Yes, Mom-now you do the same. You just do you, okay? You become more compassionate. You become more grounded. More present. More balanced. You become stronger from these trials instead of letting them do you in. And you watch others do whatever they are going to do without judgment. There’s more than one way to skin a cat, as the saying goes.
I know it is difficult to watch the ones we love make choices that we may not “approve of.” You may even think to yourself, “if they would just do x,y,z, they sure would be better off.” But it is not your choice to make. It is not your life to live. They are the ones who live with their decisions, with their behaviors, with the outcomes of their choices. Step back and give them all the space to learn and grow, the way that you need space to learn and grow yourself.
Just like teaching your kids how to ride their bike. You know when you let go of that seat they are probably going to tip over. And you let them do it anyway because that is how they learn. You must let go of other’s decisions and let them either stay the course, or tip over. Either way, you will support them, cheering them on, or cleaning up skinned knees. Your job is to support others on their journey. You can’t make the choices for them, you don’t get to judge them, and you don’t get to criticize. You choose to be more compassionate. You hold space and you love.
If you're having a hard time letting go of others' choices, you may also be interested in this article about releasing your burdens.
May you always choose to bring love and light into your space.
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