So often my clients have opinions about how another mom is being a better mom than they are. She's doing this or that. She's better at this. She never does that—Etc etc etc. 

I get it. 

But I hate it. 

For 3 reasons.  

1. The shame game does not support anyone's growth or wellness.  
2. We never know what happens in the other 23 hours and 50 minutes of the day that you don't interact with this mother.  
3. You are not the mother of her kids and she is not the mother of yours.  

Let's Talk about this for a minute. 

What does it take to be a good mom? Is a working mom a good mom? Is a stay-at-home mom a good mom? Is the one who slaves in the kitchen making fully organic meals, who doesn't have time for board games as good as the mom who makes a frozen pizza and wins tonight's round of Uno? Is it the mom who has a girls' night once a week to refill her cup or the mom who...

Trying something new is hard. It can be exciting, exhilarating even, but taking that first step is downright difficult. We tend to be creatures of habit and don’t often veer from our routines and normalcy. When we do finally take that leap, there is a whole world of possibilities out there. 

I always find it is easier to do something different when I know as much as possible about what is coming next. Like having a roadmap to my new destination. I know where I am now and where I want to be later, and I use the map to get me there. So here’s your map to Purely You! 

You have a few different options for finding your purest self. Which one you choose is up to you. Since you’re here reading this, then you’ve already taken the first step! You’re consuming content that helps you to grow, change your mindset and explore strategies to become the best version of yourself that you can be. Another easy way to do this is with Wednesday...

I am a nurse and a Women’s Wellness Coach. 

When I tell people that I usually get one of three replies. 

1. What’s a coach? 
2. Why do I need one? 
3. And my favorite… “Do you have your own life together?” 

It seems that the term coach is being used for anything and everything these days. For many years we have recognized coaches for sports of all kinds, and even voice and speech coaches. It is in more recent years that coaches for every other aspect of life have started to emerge in droves. Nutrition, finances, mindset, meditation, lifting, running, you name it, they’re hireable. Other terms used for these people have been guide, mentor, and advisor. A rose by any other name… right? In this instance, coach, guide, mentor, advisor, etc, are basically the same. To coach, by definition is to train or instruct. As a Women’s Wellness Coach, I help coach you to find wellness, in your mind, body, and soul....

New Year,  New Me! 

Or not… 

I love the passion behind the sentiment,  but I don't love the sentiment at all.  To say new me is to imply that the current you is less than. That you're not worthy of love, improvement, or growth. 

When I work with my long-term care patients, we often discuss the differences in generations.  One topic that comes up frequently is how in the past, everything was fixable, and there were people capable of doing the fixing. You didn't throw away the toaster when it quit working,  you repaired it.  You didn't get a new telephone every year. You didn't throw away your socks when they got a hole,  you mended them.  The value placed on  making something last was paramount. 

Now there are two realities here we must face. One, products are just not made like they used to be and technology is moving so fast that replacements are necessary just to keep up. This is just a...

I just love the holiday season. I love being surrounded by family, the energy of giving, the increased compassion and joy. There are two things about the season that I really don’t love though. 1. The stress people put on themselves to be perfect. And 2. How it all stops the day after Christmas. 

In my church service on Christmas morning, we heard the priest discuss how the Christmas holiday is celebrated for eight days. He encouraged us to say Merry Christmas through the New Year because Christmas isn’t over yet… the general public doesn’t totally agree though. If you walk into the store the day after Christmas (usually even before), you’ll find Valentine’s candy in place of that Christmas Spirit among the patrons. It seems as if Christmas leaves us faster than it sneaks up on us from year to year.  

Those that are stressed by the need for Christmas perfection are grateful when it's over and life can "get back to...

As you reflect on the past year, have you accomplished your goals? Have your goals changed over the last 12 months? How have YOU changed? Sometimes it's hard to look back at the year and realize we didn't get anything done we had planned to do.  On the other hand, sometimes we look back and think,  man,  look at everything I accomplished this year.

There is not one result better than the other… the concern is when either one of those thoughts is still surrounded by feelings of emptiness, frustration, or sadness. We all set goals, dream dreams,  and find motivation as the unique person we are on the first of the year. 

But life happens. And that changes us. 

Maybe you lost a loved one. Maybe you gained a family member.  Maybe a new job. Maybe a house project that turned into a major renovation. Maybe there's a global pandemic and it disrupts everything. 

Whatever the circumstances of the time that passes, it...

There I was, working with a client in a routine wellness session and I was hit with one of those phrases that make me stop in my tracks and write it down. Why? Because it is so simple, yet at that moment feels so profound. I mean I teach these concepts to my clients every day. We are always working on some variety of self-care, self-discovery, setting boundaries, and healing from our past. I have been doing this for over 8 years, and every now and then, a phrase will hit me like a ton of bricks. This session was one of those times.

See, when we allow our boundaries to be ignored, when we put ourselves last, when we take care of everyone and everything else without also taking care of ourselves, we end up unwell. For some, that looks like burnout. For some, that manifests physically. Sometimes, it's chronic fatigue, a short temper, or turning to food, alcohol, or other substances to get through the day. That will due in the short term, but eventually, it causes distress that must be...

How often do you reminisce about days gone by? A little walk down memory lane can be enjoyable, so much so that many social media apps even provide an easy way to look at all the things you were doing on this day x years ago. While I love to float on nostalgia and sit in tender moments of happiness and joy, sometimes I look back and think, “yikes! What was I thinking?!” Have you ever been there? 

I heard it said once that if you don’t look back and cringe, you’re not growing. I love that mentality. You don’t get to beat yourself up for your choices and don’t have to pretend that you’ve always made good ones. Instead, you look back at your younger self and know that each choice got you here, to the place you are now. Whether by grand design, or cause and effect, without the good, bad, and ugly decisions you have made, you wouldn’t be who you are now. 

The end of the year is often a time to reflect and set new...

I see you out there, thinking you are superwoman. Telling yourself you can do it all. You WILL do it all. "No" is not a word in your vocabulary. Of course, neither is sleep, but hey you'll have those 4 dozen cookies for the school bake sale tomorrow. I can pick you out of the crowd because that used to be me.

We have created a society that prides itself on busyness. We have trapped ourselves in the belief that to be busy is to be successful, and that to be busy is where we find our happiness. That by saying no and honoring our time, we are somehow failing. I used to take it ALL on. Do it all. I was tough enough to handle it. I was able to survive. I was strong... and I was miserable. I had given every ounce of myself to please those around me and told myself it was all from a place of service and love. Now, that's not entirely wrong, but what my young self failed to realize is that by never saying no, I was exhausting all my resources. I wasn't getting enough sleep, eating right, or...

Think about how you’d feel at work if your boss expected 100% perfection in every single moment of every single day. Anything less than 100% was grounds for disciplinary action. If there was no room for human error or an off day, it would leave you feeling inadequate, nervous, fearful, and likely unhappy in your job. That constant pressure would make for a hostile work environment and would likely not allow you to grow, only survive. 

I don’t know about you, but I likely would not remain in that kind of work environment. What about the environment you create in your own head? Are you expecting perfection out of yourself day in and day out? Are you beating yourself up multiple times a day for being “inadequate” in some way, shape, or form? There is a fine line between holding yourself accountable and beating yourself up. While it is important and in most ways vital that we hold ourselves to a particular level of excellence, it is also important...