Glimpse of Perfection

Today is International Women’s Day. Can you believe we have an entire day that the whole world has devoted to celebrating women? Stop and think about that for a minute. In the United States, it was barely 100 years ago that women were finally respected enough to be allowed to vote. Following that came the ability to go to college, be the sole owner of property and be the only name on a bank account or credit card. 

 

These changes did not happen THAT LONG AGO but for many, they are still just events of the past, not anything we truly experienced. No today, we experience a whole new variety of self-worth deterioration. Social Media. 

 

The ability to compare your life to someone else's right now is as easy as picking up your phone. Videos, photos, podcasts, blogs, books, magazines, etc are all readily available with a few taps on your device. That means we have constant exposure to people’s opinions, stories, and lives. Albeit very short looks into...

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Be a Good Mom

 

So often my clients have opinions about how another mom is being a better mom than they are. She's doing this or that. She's better at this. She never does that—Etc etc etc. 

 

I get it. 

 

But I hate it. 

 

For 3 reasons.  

 

  1. The shame game does not support anyone's growth or wellness.  
  2. We never know what happens in the other 23 hours and 50 minutes of the day that you don't interact with this mother.  
  3. You are not the mother of her kids and she is not the mother of yours.  

 

Let's Talk about this for a minute. 

 

What does it take to be a good mom? Is a working mom a good mom? Is a stay-at-home mom a good mom? Is the one who slaves in the kitchen making fully organic meals, who doesn't have time for board games as good as the mom who makes a frozen pizza and wins tonight's round of Uno? Is it the mom who has a girls' night once a week to refill her cup or the mom who...

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Learn From The Past

Are you one of those people that replays a conversation over in your mind for days thinking, “oh I should have said THAT instead!” or “what was I thinking when I uttered those words?” To some degree, we all do this. Self-reflection is a part of how we learn to be the best version of ourselves we can be. Maybe it is in that moment of awareness that you realize you could have turned a situation into a teaching moment instead of yelling at your child. Maybe in that reflection, you realize you weren’t very kind and need to apologize. Maybe, you realize that you didn’t hold your boundaries and there’s still work to do in that part of your life. All of these things are okay, as long as you allow yourself to grow through them. 

 

This type of inner dialogue becomes a hindrance when you dwell on the what-ifs and could have beens, instead of ways to improve the next similar encounter. Dwelling on the negative aspect often leads to feelings...

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Is what you're experiencing burnout?

According to an article posted in Forbes in 2021, at least 52% of the working population is feeling the strain of burnout. Yikes! That means if you’re not feeling it, the person sitting next to you likely is. The worst part is they might not even be aware of it. You can’t fix it if you don’t even realize that it’s happening. 

 

So often I hear clients tell me all the ways they are struggling in their day-to-day and then follow that up with something like, “but this is ‘adulting,’ right?” As in, I shouldn’t complain because this is just what being an adult is. They always told us being a grown-up was no fun. 

 

Here’s the reality. While being an adult does come with its own set of responsibilities and stressors that our children know nothing about, it doesn’t have to feel this heavy and exhausting! Some days are hard, yes. Some situations require a lot from you, yes. But if every day feels like a...

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Reconnect to Yourself

Did you ever get lost as a kid? Maybe got distracted in the grocery store when mom made it to the next aisle without you? Do you remember that immediate feeling of unease and maybe even panic? It was so hard to think clearly because you were LOST! It was a gut-wrenching feeling, wasn't it? 

 

Now, let me ask you this… have you ever thought to yourself, “I just don’t even know who I am anymore.”? While you may know and trust that you will survive this season of life, that feeling of “lost” still brings up some unease in your psyche. Consider the idea that a part of you feeling off is that you have lost yourself. Lost in the hustle, lost in your kids, your job, and your household obligations. 

 

A little real talk… when was the last time you did something that was just to fill your own cup? Not something to “deal with the day” or to “get away from it all” but something that genuinely made you...

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Common is not Normal

I was listening to a book the other day that explained the difference between "best practice" and "evidence-based practice" in healthcare. When I was in nursing school one thing they drilled into our heads over and over was to always perform evidence-based care instead of doing things because "that's the way they've always been done."  It got me thinking about how often in life we accept what is happening as "normal" because that is just the way it's always been. "Normal" is different in different parts of the world, different workplaces, and even inside different households. One could even go as far as to say normal is different for each body. But that is when this idea of "normal" gets a little dicey. See, so much of what we have accepted as normal in our body, might not be. Because it is common, does not mean it is normal.  When it comes to your health and your wellness it is important to distinguish between the two. 

 

For example, it is common for smokers to...

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People Are Like Plants

I recently read a post online that explained how people are like plants. No, not the idea of needing water and sunshine to thrive-although that is true too. In this case, the point was that not everyone wants to grow in the same way. There is often a lot of talk around people climbing the ladder at work, creating more financial abundance, building a bigger house, etc. More. More. More. But what does it mean if you’re happy with where you’re at? If you don’t want to climb that ladder and chase another dollar? 

 

For the sake of this conversation, it means that you grow differently. See, a Poplar grows fast, tall, and lean, while a Japanese Maple grows slow with a wider shape. Very different, but growth just the same. 

 

We are all like that too. You and I can both be growing and chasing goals, but the end result might look very different. Maybe my goal is to do some deep emotional work that no one really sees or notices, like how roots grow...

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Make Time For Your Priorities: Part 2

Last week we were discussing how often we use the lack of time as an excuse for not doing those things we said we were going to do. You can read the whole post HERE but the main jist of it is that we make time for the things we call a priority as long as we are clear about what those priorities are. 

If you feel like you’ve mastered that and you’re still struggling to find the time to do participate in the things you’d like to do, whether that is a hobby or simply keeping up with laundry then we have to change our approach a little bit. If you’ve already mastered the skill of staying committed to your goals, honoring your priorities, and avoiding distractions and you still end the day with unfinished tasks it can certainly make you feel like you’re on a hamster wheel and not getting anywhere. 

My number one tip for this: Outsource! Look to your friends, family, and small businesses to help you accomplish all the things. You can hire a cleaning...

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Make Time For Your Priorities: Part 1

So often I hear someone tell me, “I don’t have time for that.” Immediately, I know that time is not the problem. Poor time management might be at play-I know I’m not the only one that gets sucked into social media! But more than likely, it’s an unclear understanding of your priorities that is the problem. 

See, we all get the same 24 hours in a day. Most people have a 40-50-hour workweek. Most people have homes to clean, groceries to buy, and laundry to do too. Among a million other things they’d like to do. The issue lies in having to make the decision between doing thing A or thing B. I used to have the same struggle until I got intentional about how I spend my time. Because we ONLY get 24 hours in the day. I can make more money. I can buy more food. I can watch that show later, but I cannot get this moment back. It sounds so cliché, but the truth is time is priceless. No one can make more, no one can stop it, no one can refund it....

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Staying Motivated

The start of a new year, a new month, a new job, a new adventure creates an energy of new goals, dreams, and motivations. Have you ever noticed how the luster and excitement of starting something new wears off and all of a sudden you’re not interested anymore? Maybe you have a pile of yarn from that new crocheting hobby you were going to take up. Maybe you have an online course you bought to learn a new skill or some self-development. Maybe you bought a membership for a gym that you used 4 times and have never been back. Not because you didn’t enjoy any of it, but because the new wore off. Don’t judge yourself for this, it happens to the best of us—92% of us according to inc.com. So, what on earth are you supposed to do to stay motivated?

 

Step one: Stop shoulding on yourself.

 

So often we do things because we “should.” I should be going to the gym, so I’ll buy a membership. I should have a hobby to relax, so I’ll take up...

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