Be the Lighthouse

Last week we talked about delegation and how empowering others can help them develop just as much as it can help you relax. Win,  win,  right?! 


But what happens when the frustrations you have are from situations you have little control over? A client of mine recently said,  "I just wish people would be nice to each other!" Neither one of us has any control over how others behave,  but their behavior impacts us just the same.  


Hearing about murders, abuse, assault, death, hate crime, etc can sure put a damper on your day. I watch the news very sparingly for this reason. As an empath, it's hard to hear all the heavy, heartbreaking stories without doing a lot of work to keep my light shining bright. But that same heartbreak is sometimes in our own homes, our workplaces, or communities. You can just turn off the news but you can't avoid life. So what do you do? 


First,  you change your mindset. It is so easy to think...

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Women Supporting Women

I had an experience the other day that really made me think. It was a prime example of how we as women tear each other down. How instead of encouraging and embracing each other in their power, we work to prevent that in one another. Now, I’d imagine that most of us don’t do it on purpose, but it is something we need to begin to be aware of. I’ll tell you the story...


There I was having a conversation with someone about raising children. The struggles, the successes, the challenges, and all the things that come with guiding a young human in this crazy world. We have had different experiences, as she has her own biological children and no nieces/nephews and at that time I had a bonus daughter, as well as many nieces and nephews. During our conversation, she said something to the effect of, “well you haven’t had children so you don’t really understand.” My knee-jerk reaction is to say, “yeah, you’re right” and give this...

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Releasing Old Belief Systems

It is time for some real talk... I see more and more clients who are beating themselves up and undermining their uniqueness because of how they estimate their own value. 
Thoughts like, "I only got 2 things done today, I was lazy." 
"I am xx years old and still haven't gotten a promotion, I'm worthless." 
"I don't have a partner/baby, I am broken." 
"I don't have xx in my bank account, I must be doing something wrong." 
Pay attention to thoughts like these. Often these negative self-talk patterns come from belief systems we formed in childhood. Whether they were beliefs instilled in us from our parents or ones we learned along the way from our social circles and society, they are belief systems that we can let go of. 
You must first identify the belief systems you're holding that are no longer serving you. Ask yourself WHY these words are a part of your inner dialogue. Why do you feel the need to continue to behave in...
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People Are Like Plants

I recently read a post online that explained how people are like plants. No, not the idea of needing water and sunshine to thrive-although that is true too. In this case, the point was that not everyone wants to grow in the same way. There is often a lot of talk around people climbing the ladder at work, creating more financial abundance, building a bigger house, etc. More. More. More. But what does it mean if you’re happy with where you’re at? If you don’t want to climb that ladder and chase another dollar? 


For the sake of this conversation, it means that you grow differently. See, a Poplar grows fast, tall, and lean, while a Japanese Maple grows slow with a wider shape. Very different, but growth just the same. 


We are all like that too. You and I can both be growing and chasing goals, but the end result might look very different. Maybe my goal is to do some deep emotional work that no one really sees or notices, like how roots grow...

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On Your Heart

What desires, goals, or dreams have been placed on your heart? I’m not just talking about sleeping in every day or your favorite drink from the coffee shop. Let’s get a little deeper than that… What are the things that you keep coming back to? Those dreams that just never go away? 


Maybe it’s having all your family together for a meal. 

Maybe it’s selling your paintings. 

Maybe it’s teaching kiddos how to work through their emotions on the back of a horse. 

Maybe it’s having an exceptional relationship with your partner. 

Maybe it’s running an animal sanctuary where you rescue pets from being euthanized. 

Maybe it’s finding peace and joy in your life again.

Maybe it’s something else entirely… 


These goals have been placed on your heart for a reason. Not just to daydream about it while you’re stuck in your 9 to 5. Not just to be that thing you never quite...

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Other People's Choices

Every now and then when I work with a client, I say something that feels profoundly wise to me. Like an "ah-ha" moment in my own life, that somehow gets to serve that client too. It is one of my favorite things about the work that I do. I get to learn right alongside each of you and that just leads us all to a life filled with more love, joy, and happiness. Here's the statement that I was blessed to share in that session:
Other people's choices may affect you, but they are not about you. 
Ponder on that for a minute. Is there a situation in your life where you've held onto some anger, resentment, or frustration because of someone else's decision? A decision that might have changed some things in your life, but one that was made solely by another individual and didn't have anything to do with you. 
For example, let's say you're running late for work and the person in front of you is driving 3 mph under the speed limit. It is frustrating. It...
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"I'm Broken"

She said to me, “I’m broken.”

“I was abused, I’m broken. “

“I was cheated on, I’m broken. “

“I have a diagnosis, I’m broken.”

“I cannot keep a man, I’m broken. “

“I got fired, I’m broken. “

“I lost someone I love, I’m broken. “


I stared into her eyes and said, “You, my dear are not broken. Something broke your heart, but it did not break you.” 


Every time we experience pain, discomfort, heartache, we are given a choice. Allow this to define our lives and be the story of brokenness we tell, the excuse for nothing going right in our lives… OR… we let this pain be a driving force to become better. 


Your past doesn’t have to define you, it can empower you. 


To the one who was abused, you now know to never give your power away. 

To the one who was cheated on, you now know how to find...

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Criticism vs. Compassion

Offering someone compassion doesn't always feel as easy as criticizing them. Because it feels hard it might even feel “better” to criticize before we offer compassion. Sit with that for a second… it feels better to criticize others than it does to offer compassion. Not just others, but yourself too. It feels better to criticize yourself than to offer yourself compassion because that is easier. Like water, we do take the path of least resistance. But like water in a flood zone, that path can certainly be destructive! 


Today, I want you to check your inner dialogue. Whether it’s walking through the store or after a conversation with your co-workers or interacting with a customer. Your knee-jerk response is likely one with a negative approach. “What is she wearing?” “I cannot believe she allows her kids to do that!” “Grow up and manage your money like an adult and you wouldn’t need to put items back.”...

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Define Your Worth

My husband and I have this great arrangement in our marriage. If I’m working at the hospital, he cooks supper, if I’m not, I cook. I had mentioned this at work one day and one of the ladies told me how lucky I was that he would do that. For a while, I thought she was right, I am pretty lucky, not every husband would cook for his family while his wife worked 12+ hour days. And then I thought… wait a second. Although I have a great husband who is loving a supportive, I’m not "lucky" that he cooks supper 3 times a week. It’s not about luck as much as it is the things we value. We have an understanding of each other’s time and energy… Don’t go all thinking that my husband is more evolved than any other man because truthfully he is not. He calls all my work woo-woo and has never once read a personal development book in his life. However, from day one in our relationship, I knew that my time, my energy, and my financial contribution...

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Four Phases

Have you ever considered the four phases of your menstrual cycle? If you’re not trying to get pregnant (or avoid pregnancy) you might be totally unaware of the phases, with the exception of the week you bleed. Let me tell you why we need to change that. 


You know that each month your hormones fluctuate through each of the phases and each time the change, they create different desires in you. Just like Mother Nature shows off her four seasons throughout the year, you experience similar seasons throughout the month. Let’s break it down. 


Spring/Follicular phase: In this phase your body is preparing an egg for ovulation. The hormones responsible for this will make you want to plan things and create to-do lists. This would be an optimal time to create your monthly menu, shopping list, or create daycare plans for your kids. 


Summer/Ovulation: In this phase, your body releases that egg. You are now fertile. All the hormones required to allow...

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