Common is not Normal

I was listening to a book the other day that explained the difference between "best practice" and "evidence-based practice" in healthcare. When I was in nursing school one thing they drilled into our heads over and over was to always perform evidence-based care instead of doing things because "that's the way they've always been done."  It got me thinking about how often in life we accept what is happening as "normal" because that is just the way it's always been. "Normal" is different in different parts of the world, different workplaces, and even inside different households. One could even go as far as to say normal is different for each body. But that is when this idea of "normal" gets a little dicey. See, so much of what we have accepted as normal in our body, might not be. Because it is common, does not mean it is normal.  When it comes to your health and your wellness it is important to distinguish between the two. 

 

For example, it is common for smokers to...

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Women Have Always Been Strong

My husband and I have become big fans of the show “1883”. Living in Montana now, and having grown up in Wyoming, I enjoy seeing some of the history play out in “1883” and appreciate the unfolding story of how people settled this part of our world. In the show, there is a young woman who begins her journey on the Oregon Trail as a well-dressed, well-mannered, young lady. As the show progresses, we watch her begin to wear pants, gain a little more sass, and find her independence. Through her heartbreak, the hard knocks of living out of a wagon while traveling across the prairie, and the lack of “civilization” we see a different kind of strength show up in her. As we celebrate Women’s History Month, this transition is one that must be appreciated. 

 

See, women have always been strong. 

 

Mary birthed a son who she knew would be ridiculed, tormented, and eventually die. Women birth the future of the human race. We experience...

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Know Your Cycle

Be honest, how much do you think about your feminine cycle in the three weeks you’re not bleeding? Maybe you’re on birth control that prevents a bleed so you’re not aware of it at all. Or maybe you dread the day your bleed comes because you know it will come with pain, irritability, and frustration. The female cycle is one of the coolest transitions our bodies make and if you can understand how to work with it, instead of against it, I think you’ll find a whole new perspective. Let’s start that shift today. 

 

You know that each month your hormones fluctuate through each of the phases and each time they change, they create different desires in you. Just like Mother Nature shows off her four seasons throughout the year, you experience similar seasons throughout the month. Let’s break it down. 

 

Spring/Follicular phase: In this phase, your body is preparing an egg for ovulation. The hormones responsible for this will make you...

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Pelvic Pain and Emotions

Have you ever heard the expression, “she walked in like she owned the place”? Descriptions like this are referring the way someone carries themselves. Either with confidence or on the flip side, timid and shy. Either way, you can see the difference in mere seconds of being around someone. The way you carry your happiness and your stress affects every part of you and how you show up. 

 

Every situation and emotion we experience is carried in a specific place or way in the body. For example, tension is usually carried in our neck and shoulders, and that leads to tension headaches. Stress, carried in our gut,  leads to ulcers. Both of these are fairly well known. But did you know that the way you carry the stress of your obligations or your to-do list, can cause pelvic pain? 

 

As busy women, we all have to-do lists and they never quite seem to be complete. That is a stressor all in itself, but not the one that I want to explore today. March is...

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Be Open to New Things

I’m going to let you in on a little secret about how you become the best version of yourself with the least amount of resistance. 

 

You allow yourself to learn new things, accept new truths, and change your behaviors. 

 

So many of my clients come to me ready for their life to look different. Ready to “stop feeling like this” or saying, “something’s gotta give.” I love when I hear things like that because, despite their misery, I know they are in a place where they are truly ready to make some changes. 

 

It is easier said than done though, isn’t it? When we have lived with specific thought patterns or behaviors for many years, it is difficult to un-do them overnight. Especially with that little voice in the back of your head talking you out of it. 

 

Maybe it says things like, 

 

“I have done this for xx years and it’s been fine.” 

“That’s not going to...

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Acceptance

For the last few weeks, I’ve been talking about self-love and self-worth, and of course, you’ve heard me talk before about self-discovery, finding Purely You, and continuing to grow and evolve. This is my bread and butter, one could say. Without people who continue to want to be better versions of themselves, I’d be out of a job. 

 

Despite all of that, there is one thing I haven’t really talked about before, that I think is important for you to understand. 

 

Self-Acceptance does not hinder self-growth. 

 

Sometimes on this self-growth journey, we begin to judge ourselves for where we are at now. Or get impatient with where we want to be. This is one of those times, we have to take a lesson from our toddlers. 

 

At that age, your little one is not shy about their feelings, the good, the bad, and the ugly. They do not care what people think of them. And they are not in any hurry to be something other than exactly who...

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Love Yourself Like You Love Others

Did you ever watch the show Suits? It was a lawyer show running from 2011 to 2019. One of the lead characters, Harvey Spector, often had some great advice. He was a tough-love kind of man, and maybe even a little selfish once in a while, but man did he share some wisdom. I ran across a quote from him the other day and thought about you. 

 

As a kind-hearted human, you are so quick to share your love with others. To pour your energy into someone else in their hour of need, or just to put a smile on their face. 

 

You work so hard to put good into the world. 

 

You would move Heaven and Earth to ease the pain of someone you love or prevent that heartache altogether. 

 

You sacrifice your time and energy to lend a helping hand. 

 

And you do all of this without thinking twice. Because, why wouldn’t you? 

 

If someone has ever asked you why you do the things you do or told you you were crazy for putting in that much...

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Releasing Old Belief Systems

It is time for some real talk... I see more and more clients who are beating themselves up and undermining their uniqueness because of how they estimate their own value. 
Thoughts like, "I only got 2 things done today, I was lazy." 
"I am xx years old and still haven't gotten a promotion, I'm worthless." 
"I don't have a partner/baby, I am broken." 
"I don't have xx in my bank account, I must be doing something wrong." 
 
Pay attention to thoughts like these. Often these negative self-talk patterns come from belief systems we formed in childhood. Whether they were beliefs instilled in us from our parents or ones we learned along the way from our social circles and society, they are belief systems that we can let go of. 
 
You must first identify the belief systems you're holding that are no longer serving you. Ask yourself WHY these words are a part of your inner dialogue. Why do you feel the need to continue to behave in...
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On Your Heart

What desires, goals, or dreams have been placed on your heart? I’m not just talking about sleeping in every day or your favorite drink from the coffee shop. Let’s get a little deeper than that… What are the things that you keep coming back to? Those dreams that just never go away? 

 

Maybe it’s having all your family together for a meal. 

Maybe it’s selling your paintings. 

Maybe it’s teaching kiddos how to work through their emotions on the back of a horse. 

Maybe it’s having an exceptional relationship with your partner. 

Maybe it’s running an animal sanctuary where you rescue pets from being euthanized. 

Maybe it’s finding peace and joy in your life again.

Maybe it’s something else entirely… 

 

These goals have been placed on your heart for a reason. Not just to daydream about it while you’re stuck in your 9 to 5. Not just to be that thing you never quite...

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Grateful for the Lessons

It is often said in the “coaching world” that we teach that which we need to learn. My goodness, how true that is. So often I find myself saying things in a session with a client and thinking, “Self, pay attention. You needed to hear that too!” The wisdom I have been blessed with over the last 7 years of this work has helped me to grow and evolve just as much as my clients do. As we’re all in the spirit of offering gratitude, I have to share my gratefulness for these lessons! I am a human and I face challenges just like you do. Sometimes I forget to ground, sometimes I don’t say “no” often enough, sometimes I don’t make self-care a priority and I end up burnt out… We are not meant to be perfect on this journey called life, we are simply meant to find peace in the process. Every time I find myself a little off, I remember the lessons I have learned from my clients. The ones that blow my mind and speak straight to my soul....

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