If you're anything like me, you've set many different goals for yourself throughout your life. Some people set them every January, sometimes it is at your annual review at work, and sometimes, it is before starting the next academic year, shoot.... you may even set a goal for your day every morning. These things are all wonderful. It is important to have something to strive for and something to help keep you motivated. SMART goals are a great way to help you accomplish those things in life you want to be a part of your legacy. What happens when you reach that goal though? Do you set another one? Do you check it off your list, never to think of it again? Do you take the time to enjoy your success or immediately move on to something different, something more?
It depends on the goal you’re setting. Let’s use weight loss as an example. Many people set a weight loss goal at some time in their lives. Goal: Lose 20 pounds. So, you work at it. You decrease your caloric...
“I’m so weird.”
I hear that from clients from time to time and it always makes me smile. Webster's definition of weird is, “of strange or extraordinary character.”
Isn’t that interesting… strange OR extraordinary? We don’t usually use those words interchangeably, yet they are both listed in this definition. Generally, strange has more of a negative connotation in our society, and extraordinary is a positive one. And this is why I smile when people self-proclaim being weird. Because aren’t we all?
Aren’t we all a little of both? A little mix of good and bad, strange and extraordinary, light and dark?
Often when this comes up in conversation, it is used as a precursor to a statement that a person may feel judged for. For example, “I’m weird, I like carrots dipped in peanut butter.” Or, “Maybe, I’m weird but I’d rather shower at night instead of...
Did you ever watch the show Suits? It was a lawyer show running from 2011 to 2019. One of the lead characters, Harvey Spector, often had some great advice. He was a tough-love kind of man, and maybe even a little selfish once in a while, but man did he share some wisdom. I ran across a quote from him the other day and thought about you.
As a kind-hearted human, you are so quick to share your love with others. To pour your energy into someone else in their hour of need, or just to put a smile on their face.
You work so hard to put good into the world.
You would move Heaven and Earth to ease the pain of someone you love or prevent that heartache altogether.
You sacrifice your time and energy to lend a helping hand.
And you do all of this without thinking twice. Because, why wouldn’t you?
If someone has ever asked you why you do the things you do or told you you were crazy for putting in that much...
What desires, goals, or dreams have been placed on your heart? I’m not just talking about sleeping in every day or your favorite drink from the coffee shop. Let’s get a little deeper than that… What are the things that you keep coming back to? Those dreams that just never go away?
Maybe it’s having all your family together for a meal.
Maybe it’s selling your paintings.
Maybe it’s teaching kiddos how to work through their emotions on the back of a horse.
Maybe it’s having an exceptional relationship with your partner.
Maybe it’s running an animal sanctuary where you rescue pets from being euthanized.
Maybe it’s finding peace and joy in your life again.
Maybe it’s something else entirely…
These goals have been placed on your heart for a reason. Not just to daydream about it while you’re stuck in your 9 to 5. Not just to be that thing you never quite...
Sometimes it’s refreshing to not have any plans. To have a whole day open for whatever comes your way! However… it’s very hard to live every day like that. Most of us are driven by deadlines, points of necessity, and feelings of accomplishment. That is why we make to-do lists and schedules. Most of us get more done if we know what we are doing. As a general rule of thumb we do well with listing tasks for work, or getting the kids ready for the day, and maybe even our own daily routines as far as normal housework goes. But how are you doing on the road to your own wellness? Do you have a plan and goals for feeling better, more at peace, or less exhausted? Do you have any direction for having more positive relationships or a deeper connection with your partner?
Here’s the funny thing about life. We get so caught up in helping everyone else achieve their goals that we forget about achieving our own. We forget to even set our own personal goals. I...
She said to me, “I’m broken.”
“I was abused, I’m broken. “
“I was cheated on, I’m broken. “
“I have a diagnosis, I’m broken.”
“I cannot keep a man, I’m broken. “
“I got fired, I’m broken. “
“I lost someone I love, I’m broken. “
I stared into her eyes and said, “You, my dear are not broken. Something broke your heart, but it did not break you.”
Every time we experience pain, discomfort, heartache, we are given a choice. Allow this to define our lives and be the story of brokenness we tell, the excuse for nothing going right in our lives… OR… we let this pain be a driving force to become better.
Your past doesn’t have to define you, it can empower you.
To the one who was abused, you now know to never give your power away.
To the one who was cheated on, you now know how to find...
Offering someone compassion doesn't always feel as easy as criticizing them. Because it feels hard it might even feel “better” to criticize before we offer compassion. Sit with that for a second… it feels better to criticize others than it does to offer compassion. Not just others, but yourself too. It feels better to criticize yourself than to offer yourself compassion because that is easier. Like water, we do take the path of least resistance. But like water in a flood zone, that path can certainly be destructive!
Today, I want you to check your inner dialogue. Whether it’s walking through the store or after a conversation with your co-workers or interacting with a customer. Your knee-jerk response is likely one with a negative approach. “What is she wearing?” “I cannot believe she allows her kids to do that!” “Grow up and manage your money like an adult and you wouldn’t need to put items back.”...
Most of my clients will tell me that they love working with me because I don’t sugarcoat things. I’m going to tell you exactly how it is. My patients and their families will say the same thing. Sometimes, those things are hard to hear. I understand it is hard and that’s why I say it.
No, I don’t enjoy bursting your bubble, but I do enjoy watching you grow and succeed. You don’t work with me, or even read these blogs because you want to hear that you’re a perfect human being and you could do nothing better, and if something goes wrong it is always someone else’s fault. No… you’re here to grow. You’re here to get tips, tricks, and insights that help guide you to become the purest version of yourself that you can be. You’re here to gain a new perspective and make lasting changes in your life that lead you to peace and happiness and out of burnout and exhaustion.
The journey isn’t always...
I don’t know about you but as a child, I thought that my family knew what was best all the time. What we did and believed was elite and any other opinion was “wrong.” I’m talking about things like Chevy trucks, John Deere Tractors, and Pepsi. I remember the first time I saw my older sister drink a Dr. Pepper and my 8-year-old sassy self told her that in our family we drank Pepsi so she needed to make a different choice… and yes that is read with ALL THE SASS. My sister was aware of something that I didn’t know at that time. She had lived enough life to learn that it is okay to choose something different than those before us.
As you grow and evolve, you may find that you are ready to make some choices that look different than those of the people around you. Maybe even different from the choices you’ve made in the past. I’m here to tell you, THAT IS OKAY. The apple may not fall far from the tree, but it is still an...
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